Brick Walls

Brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to show how badly we want something. Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want something badly enough. They are there to keep out the other people.
- Randy Pausch ( 1960-2008 )

What are the brick walls in your life?

I'm not necessarily talking about physical impediments, but the psychological ones as well. 

What stops you, me, all of us?

The fourth of July is right around the corner.  The colonists faced the 'brick wall' of British rule and knocked the wall down, in the process of preparing to become the greatest country in the world.

What holds you back?  Sometimes it is the fear of actual success, or the fear of failure.  Either way it is fear.  If you want something, you have to give it 'the old college try'.

It is time for all of us to face our brick walls and to start knocking them down.  It may not be all at once but, small chips will weaken the wall, also.

As we celebrate Independence Day, push for personal independence and personal growth.

Just Sayin' Yankee Doodle

the Big Debate

There is a big debate that goes on in my office.

Does your desk need to be that messy?  Just to set the record straight, nothing is growing on it, it just has a lot of papers and things on it.  I know where everything is, but my office staff wants to come in and 'clean' it.  (I think they mean throw everything out)


A cluttered desk is a sign of a busy person.  All that filing, straightening, organizing, lining everything up takes time.  Time I can be using to do other more productive things, like writing this blog.

As a full time Dentist and part time desk Jockey, what time I am at my desk I am usually working not 'cleaning'. Oops, interrupted, my patient has arrived...gotta go...desk straightening will have to wait...again.

love what you do

As we are driving to Lake Placid in the rain, to go to a skating competition, we always reflect on why we do what we do.  My daughter has been skating since she was three, and she has a very simple philosophy:

love what you do, do what you love.

This applies to all aspects of life.  If we don't like what we are doing then the time we spend doing it will drag on.  If we have fun and enjoy ourselves, our lives will be more fulfilled, and meaningful.

Whatever you do in life, Smile and have fun.  That is my goal.  It cuts the stress level in half.

Just Sayin'

longest Day

Everyone always asks for more hours in the day in order to accomplish the tasks they have. 

Well today is your day. 

We haven't added hours, but today is the day of the year with the most amount of daylight.  So by conjecture today is the longest 'day' of the year.

Get out there and do all  the things you wanted to do if you had more time.

Smile a little longer, you've go the time.

Just Sayin'

Happy Father's Day

I hope you all had a wonderful Father's Day.

This has been a wonderful weekend.  It started with a great course on photography Friday morning.  I had to leave early in order to attend my daughter's graduation. 

As we sat outside in the bleachers watching the graying, darkening sky along with the occasional lightening crackle, we held our breath...would the weather hold?  It did.  The rain didn't occur until shortly after the ceremony was over.

Saturday night we celebrated a friend's birthday at Junior's restaurant at the MGM Grand.  What a  great evening.

Father's day morning I was in the office repairing a young man's upper left central incisor.  He was in town visiting his parents (who are patients of mine).  He broke it eating a spare rib. 

In roughly an hour I helped him be able to smile for his mother and father on Father's Day.

My weekend ended with my daughter baking a pizza sized cookie for us al to share.  Don't worry we will brush afterwards.

Just Sayin' ... have a happy day

Winning Smile

Last night the Boston Bruins won the Stanley Cup for the first time since 1972.  Simply amazing!

I remember as a kid growing up on Long Island going to hockey games with my dad. The team was a new young team that grew out of the farm league, Long Island Ducks.  They eventually became the Islanders.

When I was in College in Boston, I remember going into the Old Boston Garden and seeing the Celtics' and Bruins' banners hanging from the rafters.  There was great sense of sports history.

The City of Boston and ALL of New England has a huge Smile on its collective faces, after a seven game series.

And Let's not forget the Smiles in Dallas, after the Mavericks beat the 'dream team' of the Miami Heat.

We all have reasons to Celebrate and SMILE.

Tomorrow my daughter graduates High School, trust me we will be smiling too.

What is the value of a Smile?

What is the value of a Smile?  Can you place a value on a facial expression?

I think you can.  a truly joyous smile is irreplaceable with any currency known to mankind. 

That first smile at about 6-8 weeks old (when you realize it isn't gas), becomes emblazoned in your mindset forever.  It is the currency that you base all other smiles on.

A smile, a wink, a nod, all have value in my book.

To see someone happy is priceless.

The ear to ear smile that crossed my daughter's face friday night as she left with friends for her senior prom, holds the save value as those young infant smiles.  All eminating from true unadulterated joy and happiness.

As a smile designer, we get to see this more often than most.  Many times, lips an tongues are numb while our clients try to show off their new smiles but the radiant happiness that they emit is evident.

A smile is curved line that sets all things straight.

Just Sayin':  There's Magic in Your Smile

Cinderelly

When do our children grow up to be adults?  Is there an answer to this age old question?  They grow before our eyes yet we don't see it til someone points it out to us.  The fact that we can't see what is right in front of us is disturbing.  These are the moments we need to treasure. 

One great way is to TAKE LOTS OF PICTURES.  Even the blurry and not so good ones, will help relive memories, and those 'brain pictures' will be crystal clear.  I have a patient with young children who is doing a great job of this.  Early in life, each month she takes a picture of her baby and toddler, and Chronicles their growth next to the same chair in each photo (that way it is easy to see their growth progress).  The changes over their short lives is amazing and this photo essay a great tribute to their growth.  I would like to thank her for sharing her childrens' development with us.

After 23 years practicing dentistry in the same small town, I have watched 'my kids' grow.  The other day one of my patients who was nine when I started, came in for a hygiene visit. Nothing amazing in this area, except that she came with her husband, three year old and five week old children (the others were in school).  I feel as if,  I've come full circle, and we are definitely a FAMILY practice.

My daughter's Senior Prom is tonight and she will die of embarrassment if she thinks I am writing about her, but it is my parental prerogative.  Where did the time go?   Unlike Cinderella who was transformed by woodland creatures and a fairy godmother in an instant, my beautiful young woman has slowly progressed into the beautiful Princess that she is.  And it has been one of the greatest pleasures of my life watching her blossom.

To borrow from Fiddler on the Roof:
(Tevye)
Is this the little girl I carried?
Is this the little boy at play?

(Golde)
I don't remember growing older
When did they?

(Tevye)
When did she get to be a beauty?
When did he grow to be so tall?

(Golde)
Wasn't it yesterday
When they were small?

(Men)
Sunrise, sunset
Sunrise, sunset
Swiftly flow the days
Seedlings turn overnight to sunflowers
Blossoming even as we gaze

Make Time to enjoy your seedlings, and enjoy watching them Grow.

Just Sayin'

yes and no

Sometimes it is not the actual words we use but how we use them and the context they are in.  Occasionally  something 'BAD' is really good.

We've all heard  she said no but meant yes,  and realized it was cop out, and a crock.

NO, does mean NO in this case.

But does yes mean no? Sometimes people when they don't know what to answer will simply nod and say yes.   How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod in agreement and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
Are you a yes man or woman?  Do you say yes and regret it afterwards?  Yes isn't bad if you mean it, but it can get you trapped into something you didn't anticipate.

Saying yes is a good thing, it shows agreement, caring and concern and a willingness to participate, but it is ok to say no and mean it if that is how you feel.

Don't get trapped on the hamster wheel of Yes, mix it up a bit.  If we are true to ourselves we can be true to others.

Just Sayin'

Thx

I understand from some that there was an error when this blog was first posted, and that many of the letters were jumbled, Dr Holden and I actually watched them change on the screen.  It was like a scene out of Harry Potter, watching the letters change.  So here it is again with modifications:

First of all I'd like to thank everyone for the support and encouragement as I write this blog.  It is becoming a lot easier and a bit more fun than when I started.

How often do we say thank you?

Is it only when we receive a gift?
Is it only when customers leave a store, "thank you for shopping at ..."?

I think we don't do it often enough.

The other night we had a late patient with a broken tooth.  Without thinking I offered to do the crown for her right away (willing to be late for my pottery class), and before I could even ask, my assistant said, "I can stay."

I immediately said thank you.  After the procedure was done and we were getting ready to leave I said thank you again.  I'm pretty sure that one of my assistants heard me but I am unsure if the other one who willingly stayed also heard me.   The thank you is to both of them.

If I don't say thank you enough, I'm sorry.  Part of being a team is saying please and thank you.  It also includes occasionally not saying these things and knowing they are implied and that your actions are appreciated.

Plus we need to say thank you to our servicemen and women who serve and protect our freedoms, which allow us the luxury of saying  THANK YOU.
So to everyone out there we need to say the following things:

Gracias, Merci, Danke, Todah, Dziekuje, M Goi, Spasibo, Thanks,...

Just Sayin'

or as this new generation of texters would put it, thx or tx

Fighter

Saw The Fighter this past weekend.  Very enlightening film.  Not only does it show the dark side of drug use, and the struggle to overcome addiction, but it shows how the spirit of one man can change his family. 

Most of the time we all know what to do to accomplish our goals, but we never get there, why is that?  Why is it that some people get all the way?  Are they really better than the rest of us?  Probably not. So what do they have?  I feel liker the Wizard of Oz.  They have....no I'm not going to open my carpet bag and pull something out.

What some of the best athletes have is GOOD COACHING.  Having someone to answer to, to guide you, to see objectively how you are doing, and to be honest with you, that is how you accomplish your goals.

In The Fighter, Micky Ward knew how to box, but needed a change in coaching and management in order to propel him tho the next level.  It is foolish to think that we can go it alone.

Our goal is to coach our patients into helping themselves better.  By the time we reach adulthood, most people have been taught how to brush and floss dozens of times, but they need that reinforcement. 

My daughter needs her figure skating coach to say, "...pull your arms in, leg out, and smile...", she knows all this but we all need reminding.

A few years ago we utilized the coaching services of a Dental Consulting company to help us refocus.  We still use many of the items we learned from them, but if we want to strive to be even better perhaps we need a change in coaching style, technique and direction.

We all want to be better at what we do.  We all seek out teachers, coaches, and mentors.  They encourage and guide us.

Just Sayin'

NBA, NHL, MLB...

It is amazing, it is June, and I am watching Basketball, and Hockey.  It's Baseball, the game of the boys of Summer, that is supposed to dominate the airwaves? 

The thing that makes the NBA Finals and the Stanley Cup, games more exciting than other games throughout the year is the amount of teamwork and cooperation it took to get these teams to this point in the year.  The other teams with perhaps a bit less heart and cohesiveness are home watching on television like the rest of us.

This doesn't mean they are not any good, indeed many of them have great players, but do they create a cohesive 'great' team?  This applies to all aspects of our lives.  We don't live in a vacuum as is evidenced by the fact that people outside my home are reading this.  We are all parts of different teams, our schools, churches, synagogues, social and service clubs. 

According to Wikipedia: A group in itself does not necessarily constitute a team. Teams normally have members with complementary skills and generate synergy through a coordinated effort which allows each member to maximise his or her strengths and minimise his or her weaknesses. Team members need to learn how to help one another, help other team members realize their true potential, and create an environment that allows everyone to go beyond their limitations.<sup>[1]

The goal in a dental team is to utilize each member to the benefit of our clients oral health care.  This is accomplished by bringing great people together and having them work as one. 

On the side that our patients don't see is the amount of work that goes into being a good team.  Just like in sports, we practice, we continually learn and we work on projects behind the scenes in order to be the team you want us to be.  We participate in continuing education.  We go on team outings together in order to better understand one another and bring us closer together as a team.  Without working cohesively together, we would simply be great people all in the same building.

May the best team win.

Just Sayin'

BTW:  Also saw the French Open (tennis) this weekend, this belongs at this time of year.</sup>

A Good Question

I was recently asked by a prospective patient, why they should come to our office instead of the one they were presently at.

This is a great question.  I hope my answer was as great.

Caught a bit off guard but still prepared to try and win over this family, my mind raced through analogies and metaphors.  From the perspective of someone outside of dentistry, we are all the same.  They can't see the contours of the teeth we've restored, they don't know if my margins are sealed and perfect. 

Mostly they are just aware of how we treat them, the item that has the least to do with the clinical aspect of dentistry, but the most important in the mind of  our patients. 

In the mind of many a hamburger is a hamburger.  So what is the difference between McDonald's and Burger King?   Perhaps you prefer the flame broiling.  So what is the difference from the fast food chain burger and the local diner?  Or the local Diner and a Burger at Michael Jordan's Sport Cafe? 

The fast food burger is say, $3.00, the diner, $8.00, and Michael Jordan's $18.00.  Isn't beef all the same?  So what are we paying for?  Service, ambiance, the intangibles.  Just like the patients perspective it is the thing that is furthest from the kitchen (clinical arena), that we notice and upon which we judge our experiences .

Hopefully in life we get what we pay for.

Just Sayin'

Lost Spring...Beware Hurricanes

Yesterday was June 1st.  The official beginning of hurricane season.

Does this mean that hurricane's aren't allowed to occur before this date.  Since when does weather truly follow a calendar.  Here in Connecticut, we went from cool frost advisory evenings to a near heat wave in a matter of days.  

As the weather gets warmer and daylight gets longer, we all want to spend more time doing outdoor activities.  People seem to go into a trance like 'vacation' mode even while being home.  We've left the winter doldrums behind, and moved on to a sunny rekindling of spirit.

As the weather gets nicer and people begin to smile more, they all of a sudden seem to have more activities to juggle.  This causes many people to forget their scheduled appointments.

Now the question is when an adult responsible for remembering their appointment?  At what point is the 'reminder' call an insult to ones ability to remember and be responsible, and when is it coddling and allowing the individual  to be less responsible and having the office involved take the full burden and blame.  "I didn't show up because YOU, didn't call me to remind ME."

There is no 'season' for responsibility, it is a life time goal and accomplishment.  We are all responsible for ourselves.

Hurricanes come when conditions are correct, irregardless of the calendar (sorry weather people, this is the truth).  As people we are governed by the calendar, and the appointments we put into that calendar.

Just Sayin'